An Interesting Read

Well my house has just emptied of the homegroup, and it was a lovely evening of lively discussions. We are reading a very interesting book called Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell. I must say he is what I call a little edgy, and definitely an out of the box thinker, but I totally love it. I like to be challenged on the way I perceive things and I really enjoy questioning why I believe what I believe.

I love finding truth and beauty in the things of life that seem ugly. I often think about the christians in third world countries who have absolutely nothing but a love of the savior, where as I have so much stuff that gets in the way of giving my whole heart to God, and they give everything they have to him with reckless abandon because they have the inside scoop on how fragile this life is and what really matters. I've been to Africa, I've driven hours into the bush to a little mud village of grass huts to attend a church service. I've met the people that make the 2 or 3 hour walk every sunday to this village because a preacher with a bible will be there. These people aren't being brainwashed or showing off to impress the neighbor, or participating in something that isn't real. They come because they have experienced the living God in all his goodness, glory, love, mercy and judgement, and they know that their lives mean everything to him who created them. They have met God. I sometimes envy the ones whose lives have been stripped of the things of this world and yet love God with all their hearts.

This little blurp has nothing to do with Velvet Elvis, but I have been thinking of the barren life today. So much of my time is spent maintaining the stuff I have instead of cultivating the people I have. Don't get me wrong, I love my blessed, cushy life, but there comes a time when you want to know if you have what it takes to live a truly sacrificial life. Would I walk hours to church? Would I love on a filthy diseased person? Would I give up my comforts? And would I really give my life to God? I don't know.

Hubby Away

Nate left for an out of town mtg. yesterday, but I didn't want to say anything in case I have a stalker on board. I have to say that when he goes on these little short trips I kinda enjoy not having to share the remote, or cook anything big. I do hate sleeping by myself, even though he is a huge cover hog and wrestles with his body pillow which I've given a name to since he enjoys hugging it so much, and will actually frantically search for if she gets lost. I'm a big chicken in my bed once the clothes come off. We've had a full day and it went by quickly. We did school as usual, then went to homeschool P.E. where they had balloon relay races, then off to the library, then to a friends house, and finally Zaxby's for dinner. The boys are off listening to Hank the Cowdog on tape, and I'm here contemplating if there could be anyone hiding in the house or attic. I hate coming home in the dark.

Early to Bed?

I thought if you went to bed early it would mean that you would wake up early. Apparently that is not true for me, because no matter how early I go to bed I still don't wake up until somewhere between 7:15 and 8:20. I know those numbers are weird, but it's true, I hardly ever wake up before 7:15, and I hardly ever sleep past 8:20. My mom and mom in law can literally rise while it's still night, like 4:30-5:30, and no they did not grow up on farms.

We had a busy weekend, saturday was spent at a disc golf tournament, even Luke walked the 27 hole course and played the whole game. Evan played with some nice men who gave him a disc that he had been checking out. And Austin scored well for his age and was pleased with his performance. We walked from group to group watching our guys play, and I must say that I got quite a nice workout from that.

Yesterday we were at the in laws house walking the property and trying to find a place for them to build their retirement home on. We are probably going to buy the family big house, so there have been countless negotiations going on recently, but I think we are ironing everything out and things will start proceeding from here. Once we decide to do something, I am a hurry up and do it person, Nate is a take your time person, and that is just one of the reasons his nick name from me is Pokey.

I Can't Get Comfortable

I don't know if I ever recorded my thoughts on how and why we started the adoption of our haitian princess, but I want to never forget the stirring I felt from the Lord. I have always thought that I would adopt someday, I mean even when I was young I used to tell people I wanted a little black boy from haiti. But life happened and I had 3 wild boys, my husband had started his own paintball business, and we lived in a single wide 2 bedroom trailer. There was enough tension in me to launch a rocket into space. Life got busier and busier, and by the time we moved into the house we are in now, frankly I was happy, content, and comfortable with our life. My kids were all at the age where I didn't have to watch them every second, they could get ready by themselves, and we were enjoying a good life. Even though Tonya was in the middle of her adoption and I was excited by it, I felt content to wait until "the time was right" for us to start ours. But one evening near Christmas 05 I was sitting in front of the fire just thinking, and I heard the lord (not audibly) say to me, "don't get too comfortable." I thought about that for several days, what exactly that meant for me. I came to realize that the timing would never be perfect, that I could get used to the easy life, that my nature is to say "I can't", and I could never get so comfortable that when I felt God calling me I was to comfy where I was to move. To some people this will never be a problem, but for me it is a huge problem. If my robe feels good, I'll want to stay in it all day, if the bed feels good, I won't get up, if the family room is warm and cozy, I can sit in it for hours not doing anything, just not wanting to move. I can get comfortable really fast and not push myself to be all that God has created me to be. I shared all this with Nathan, thinking that I was going to push him off the cliffs of insanity, since his business had switched from manufacturing paintball products, to manufacturing products for the dept. of defense, and other military around the world. Thankfully he agreed right away and we got started a couple of weeks later. Sometimes I run into people who when I tell them all the above, they look at me and say "I don't know if that is a good enough reason to adopt." Honestly, I can't think of a better reason then that God asked me to stretch myself and we said yes. And of course I'd like to raise a daughter, and we have the means to do this, and yes God asks us to take care of widows and orphans. Now I can't wait for her to come home, and I'm terribly excited to see what kind of little person will grace our lives, but the beginning was feeling the stirrings of God rousing me out of a comfortable position. I know he will give me everything I need to do this job well, and frankly now that I'm up from my comfy position I realize how bored I get when I feel comfortable all the time.

Lazy

I'm posting in the middle of the day, and if you are a homeschooling mom you know that this means I'm having a lazy day. I usually do check email after school is all done, however I usually wait till later to respond and post stuff. I took no shower today ,(but did get dressed) I did get school done, change sheets, clean the boys rooms, and did a general pick up around the house. We are having homegroup tonight and we meet here the majority of the time. Still I feel like I'm dragging my carcass around and moving in slow motion. I feel a little depressed for no particular reason, and I can't find anything good to eat in the house, so I've settled for a cup of non-decaf hot tea with milk and sugar. I think the problem is that I have not been outside to do anything in over a week, unless you count getting the mail. I think I need a brisk walk in the cool air, unfortunately I'm to unmotivated today to go do it. Instead I've found myself literally standing in front of the wood burning stove seeing how tough the skin is on my backside. It's not even that cold here in Georgia unless 50 degrees is cold.

The children's behavior the last two days has been most unflattering. I've found myself saying over and over again, "stop using your tongue for death, and use it for life" all to no avail. On a positive note the duct tape on Luke's thumbs is working out quite nicely, I have to change it several times a day but so far so good. I must say that he was ready to quit sucking his thumbs and wanted a little help, hence his cooperation on keeping the tape on.


The stupidest thing I've done is think I wanted the boys to have a dog. Don't get me wrong I think all little boys should grow up with a dog, but not a dog the size of a small horse, especially if your back yard is a quarter of an acre. Jacket (the offending dog) likes to bark at night, likes to poop everywhere, and likes to chew on anything and everything including the trampoline. He has ripped off and shredded the foam covers on the trampoline poles, he's chewed the door frames on the porch, I think he's devoured 3 pairs of shoes, and has now started to pull the undersides of the house out and shred that. I've wanted to just let him get lost so many times, but Nate thinks he is a super smart, good dog and that when we move out of here we will love having him around for the boys. The jury is still out on this one. He is a beautiful dog though, black lab and blue tick hound mix. I'm just more of a cat woman.

Attempt 101

This is our 101st attempt at getting Luey to quit sucking his thumb. This happened at dinner last night, it was a rough evening for him. First he had to eat veggie soup, which he said "this horrible stuff will send me to the grave, these terrible onions will make my breath stink". Then we put the duct tape on his thumbs and his night got worse. "For all eternity is this my destiny", he has truly turned into our family ham, I have no idea where he gets it from. ha, ha.

The Whole Family

Nate's sister is visiting from California so the whole weekend has been family reunion time. Our family time is really nice but incredibly chaotic and noisy. There are 10 children 9 and under, and 8 of them are boys. The 2 youngest are the girls so they don't contribute to the noise factor to much. Then there are the adults, Nanny and Papa, Nate and I, Tonya and Landon, Jenny and Ryan, Tammy, Sandi, and Doug. My in laws have a really big house that we will probably be buying from them this year, so I will get to host the parties soon. I must say that I am grateful for this family because unlike some big families we get along with each other pretty good. I've had a few crying fits over the past 16 years, but I think that is pretty good compared to one poor soul I know who has had a boxing match at their family christmas dinner. Nate is on a weight lose competition with his brother(who is 10 years his junior), I think it is a $25 bet on who can lose the most weight and inches over the next month or so. Nathan started his diet right away this morning, but I think Ryan is going to go for bust at the last minute. Since they work together, I'm sure that there will be lots of backstabbing and conspiring against each other. I will probably be spending alot of time in my coat closet, (that's where I hide the candy and junk I still want to eat) Don't worry Nate hardly ever reads my blog, and when he discovers one hiding place there are plenty more to chose from.

A Rainy Day

Well it was a little icy this morning so school got off to a slow start. Nate had brought home a bunch of fire wood the night before, and told me to get the boys to haul it in this morning. They cried and complained about going out into the cold rain and doing work until they realized there were icesicles all over the place, then I couldn't get them to come in until they were frozen. I had to holler outside a couple of times when I saw them eating ice off the trash cans. (yuck) I had made yummy bean soup with ham the night before so we heated that up for lunch. Austin said he actually liked it, but Evan and Luke said it was good only once. I have been walking around on my tip toes today (literally) trying to build up my calf muscles. My ankles and calves are fattening up even as I write. I can't even come close to closing my fingers around my ankles, and I don't want to hear any back talk about my being skinny. I know I am fairly skinny but nobody likes to see their body morph before their eyes, so I'm trying to remember to jump in place and walk on tip toes lots everyday. I do need to get some curtains for my family room if I'm going to keep this up, the house next door can look right into my kitchen and family room.

Something Exciting on the Horizon

I've known about this for a couple of weeks but haven't said anything because I wasn't sure it was gonna fly. I have been given the opportunity to work for the humanitarian aid organization that I'm working with to process my haitian adoption. I will be starting up and heading a grants division. That means we will be giving money to people that have the heart to adopt but have financial needs as well. It will also include grants given to specific children that have been in the orphanage for a long time, or older children and special needs kids. I am terribly excited by this, I knew when I started my adoption that wouldn't be the end of my involvement with orphans. I feel that God is opening a door for me to help others adopt and spread awareness about the plight of orphans. I know that God is going to bless this and I'm so thrilled to be a part of it. I will keep you posted on how things progress. We are not going to start this program until there is 20,000 in the account. I have 5,000 pledged already. Gotta run noodles are boiling over.

My Slaves

I've turned my little men into my little slaves ha, ha, ha hee, hee, hee, It was high time they pitch in around the house. They have always had little chores that haven't helped me out a whole lot, but now they are doing alot of helpful things, like: unloading and loading dishwasher, vaccuming, cleaning toilets, taking all their laundry upstairs and cramming it in their drawers, and putting away groceries, plus dusting and cleaning mirrors. Some of these jobs like the bathroom require that I watch them and show them what to do the first couple of times, but then they get the hang of it and all I have to do is check when they're done. Attitudes have been much better about work since we started boot camp. Luke has been the most resistant to this shift of power, everytime I ask him to do something he wants to say " Is this my destiny", or "this is not my destiny" We have not been watching any Star Wars movies. There was pee all over the back of the toilet the other day and I called them all into the bathroom to see it and claim it. Nobody would admit to even ever missing the water so Luke said it must be me. I told him it couldn't have been me and he said "oh yeah, when you get mad I've seen it in your eye." lol. I have no idea what that says about me as a mother, so I cleaned it up.

My weekend was incredibly boring, we didn't do anything fun, we didn't get anything done around the house, and now monday is looming and I am not ready for another week of school. Usually it's the natives who are restless, this weekend it was me. I can't really blame anything on PMS anymore since my uterus is gone, but that is probably my problem, cuz I still have hormones, I'm breaking out, and I feel like pouncing. Oh and Nate has been doing work on his laptop, and lusting after some special kind of corvette. (ugh) I can not share in the excitement over a car. Also he has been reloading ammunition (translation= making his own bullets), Oh how I need my little girl to come home.

Catching up with old friends

In the past few weeks I've reconnected with 2 of my dearest friends from my high school days. (the hard rockin 80's) Jacque and Brijet. You know how with some friends no matter how long it's been since you talked to them, it's like it was yesterday, well that's how it is with them. Brijet actually went to my high school, and Jac was in my youth group, she later on became my maid of honor. We have known each other for 20 years (I can't believe I'm that old) and in a good way, some things like good friends never change. I spent a couple hours last night on the phone with Jacque, that's why I'm taking it slow this morning and posting. I am so grateful for all the special relationships God has put in my path over the course of my life, old and new, that have caused me to grow and stretch, and the ones that I laughed till I cried with, they are all so precious. Even though Nate is truly my best friend and there is nobody I'd rather hang out with, I am so glad for the women in my life.

Next: Nate takes the boys one at a time golfing with him, today it's Luey's turn and he just walked by with his 2 junior clubs in hand, yelling that he's ready to go, but he is still stark naked. Nudity runs in his genes I'm afraid.

P.S. Garlic IS a magic potion disguised in a stinky little clove.

I Stink

I stink, no I really do stink! I have been doing some raw garlic treatments on myself for the last 3 days, and all Nate can say is Whew!!!. Well truthfully he said a whole lot more especially when we are in bed. Let's see the first night it was "do you have terrible gas" as he fluffed the covers and gave me his cold shoulder. I didn't even acknowledge that one. The next night it was "you smell like a rotting compost pile", I just downplayed that one. And finally last night "you smell like one big burp of polish sausages", "you'd better see a doctor" to which I finally told him that I had seen a doctor and nothing had worked so I'm trying my own home remedies like garlic, grapefruit seed extract, vinegar, and peroxide. He said "you are really starting to get weird", I can't believe he just now noticed. Well if you don't hear from me for awhile it's probably because I killed myself. I've had some unfortunate events happening recently. This afternoon while talking on the phone with one ear and cleaning out the other ear with a Q-Tip, the whole Q-tip head came off inside my ear pretty deep. The person on the line said she'd come over and help me tweezer it out, but after I calmed down I was able to put tweezers in my own ear and pull out the offending ball of fuzz. You see what I mean, it's been a strange week.

I love my church

I hope all of you who go to church enjoy yours as much as I enjoy mine. There is no set ending time, we just worship till we're done whether it's 11:30 or 1:00. The kids have cool banners and flags that they waive around in the aisles, and dancing always takes place somewhere. Today the worship leader told the guys to turn off all the lights so we could see the drummers light up sticks as we sang "Set me on Fire" The people are all my closest and dearest friends, and the truth is always spoken there. I feel like I got saved there even though I had accepted christ as a small girl. I have never grown more since joining GCF 10 years ago. I am a woman truly blessed.

Ring around the Rosey

This was the first time she had ever played and they all played for an hour

She looks like someone I can't wait to get to know

Laughing with friends

They were teaching the kids new songs

Happy girl

This is Dania and our case worker Kirsten from Answered Prayers

Showing her white bunny teeth

Pictures of our girl

I can't wait to get my hands on her hair.

School again

I've been busy this week starting school again, after having taken off a little over 2 weeks. My boys are back in boot camp, which translates that I am not putting up with any crap, (bad attitudes, whinning, talking nasty to each other) God is constantly reminding me how the small foxes spoil the vineyard. If I let them get away with the above mentioned they grow dissatisfied with their lives, they become ungrateful about everything, like their toys, snacks, each other and even Nate and I. It is so my tendencies to just feel frustrated but not be willing to put in the major work, because no matter how consistent I am the rewards now are small and shortcoming. I can honestly say however that when I have been faithful and not grown weary doing good, I do reap my reward, even though sometimes it has been years down the road.

My other news is that I got to see 500 pictures of the mission trip to Haiti that my adoption facilitator went on. There were 20 or more pictures of my girl that I will post as soon as I figure out how to get them off shutterfly. People say she is self assured and not pushy for attention, which is a good sign. She is also truly delightful and kind, and as I see more pictures of her and catch glimpses of her personality I am feeling more and more attached to her and can't wait to meet her. The latest news from the adoption front is IBESR is moving along steadily but now the passport officials are holding things up. Some people have now been waiting for passports for 6 months, it used to take 1 or 2. But all things work together for good for all who are called according to his purposes. Right?