The short lived ginger bread house

This is the picture that sucked me in.

All the pieces were in place.

Every one was ready to start.

Nate was ready for construction.

Construction began

It was coming together nicely..

We added the decorations, though it looked nothing like the box.

Then the foundations shook, and the roof started to slip.

There was no stopping the collapse

So we decided to eat it,

and lick all the icing off.

The poor gingerbread house.  It didn't turn out quite like I expected.

Flashback

This was the very first picture I ever saw of Dania, and that is when I knew that she was going to be ours.  I had no idea that it would be 4 long years until we met. There was a lot of confusion and frustration in these in between years, I had a lot of wants and desires that I saw slipping away, yet I trusted that he knew best, and was given the grace to trust that his timing was perfect and that he is good.

This was the first time we met, one year ago last night. She grew up without us, and yet she had the most perfect father to watch over and protect her until it was time to release her out of his hands into ours.  He did a better job of caring for her than I ever can do, and I am so grateful for his provision, protection and love.

Traditions and Plans

Every year, in almost all things that we do, I have plans and we have traditions.  The traditions are usually carried out, my plans are often thwarted.


Christmas Traditions
Going to a tree farm and cutting our own down - usually happens
Going out to lunch after our successful tree hunt - Chik Fil A every year
Having it up the weekend after thanksgiving - pretty consistent
Having everyone participate in the decorating - after several tearful years of begging, this now happens.
Playing Christmas music, usually O Holy Night (from every artist imaginable, compliments of Nate) - check
Only opening presents on Christmas morning - DEFINITELY
Rotating who places the special placing of the angel at the top of the tree - yes

Christmas Plans by me
Everyone getting along on the hour ride to the farm and appreciating the beautiful scenery - keep dreaming
Getting something different than chicken nuggets with buffalo sauce - can't - break - free - yet!
Being okay with not having it up on Saturday after thanksgiving - I still feel myself hyperventilating at the thought of losing days without Christmas lights on in the house.
Not to nag everyone to help decorate the tree - from all my previous nagging and cajoling, it's not too big of an issue.
Force myself not to run screaming over to the computer and smack it off the table after an hour of O Holy Night. ( thank goodness the chipmunks have yet to release a version of it)
My plans are never thwarted about Christmas present opening, because there are 2 big people against the little people.
I never have plans for the angel.

I love traditions! I love making new ones! I am flexible with that as long as I planned it.  I have found that my plans really serve no purpose, except to force me to have expectations that I have no right to have.  I have been slowly learning, to slowly release my plans.  If ever a holiday or family outing is ruined, it is because I had some expectation that was not met. Did I mention how slowly I have been learning this.  This year was the first year in memory for Nate or I that we did not get into any kind of scrap.  That includes Thanksgiving, which we hosted 23 people at our house.  Amazing! I am on a roll and I do not want to lose it coming into the home stretch.  I am undertaking a new outlook on life in general.  My new years resolution (which I never really like to say) is starting early.  I am spending the month of December in considerable reflection and deliberate actions, to put me on a new path for the coming year.  Christmas plans are just the tip of the iceberg. BTW, I love O Holy Night!