Ponderings

Well for the past two days I've been trying to figure out what I'm really good at and what I'd like to do with my time, besides homeschool, cook, clean, and play Duthc Blitz or Chess with my kids.
My personal hobbies are incredibly limited since I have little tag alongs all the time. I love reading and do a whole lot of it, unfortunately I watched alot of TV growing up and it has severly stunted my creativity not to mention my desire to do anything about it. (so no tv for my kids during the school week period, and very little for me) So what I'm trying to say is I think I'm lazy and unmotivated. But I have the desire to change, thus the ponderings for the last few days. I've been asking my dh for his input, however after asking him what he thinks I am good at and hearing "you're a good little cook and mom" I think I will have to take my ego somewhere else. lol. I love music unfortunatley I am rythmnically challenged and don't have a good ear. I love dance but haven't been able to touch my toes since Jr. High. I'm not overweight I just think I was born without tendons or ligaments. So my ultimate dream would be to have a small farm with some goats, pigs, chickens, a couple of cows and a big garden with a bunch of homeschooled kids running around. I am a good manager but I stink at all the mundane follow through, so I could use a gardner, housekeeper, and tutor. I think I was born in the wrong century because all this is really adding up. Seriously though there is no place that I would rather be than home with my kids taking care of my husband and home. I have a great life. I just have a nagging sense that God has something else to add to the pot, or else that nagging sense is discontment trying to creep in and make me ungrateful. AWW the dilema!!! I have so many soap boxes I would love to preach from sometimes I wonder why my name wasn't Oprah.